Gay and Grieving: Celebrating the Past and Creating a New Beginning

  • Living In Fear of Loss

    I used to live in a world where I could go out my door in the company of the man I loved and not worry about being in danger simply because of who we were. Read more

  • Broken

    I’m convinced the glue that allows us to revitalize broken spirits after the loss of a loved one is love. Read more

  • Ticking

    When it comes to those we love, the clock is always ticking. Read more

  • Throuple

    Marty, Michael, and I are in a kind of throuple. Even though he’s gone, and I’m in a new relationship, Mike is not only part of my life but Marty’s as well. Read more

  • Traditions

    Mike’s loss taught me to hang onto tradition and revere it for the precious thing it is.  Read more

  • Football

    Sometimes, when I see fans rise to their feet in a crowded stadium or catch a player doing a victory dance, I’m reminded of the vital and unique man I lost. Read more

  • Opportunities

    I shouldn’t be so quick to dismiss an opportunity to do something nice for those I love. Read more

  • Gifts

    If I’m fortunate enough to be showered with such gifts, it also means that I have the responsibility to heap a corresponding amount of care on the man I love. Read more

  • A Day for the Living

    For me, it would be a Day for the Living instead of a Day of the Dead. Read more

  • Missing Michael

    All these emotional gymnastics have taught me a thing or two about grief—that, like love; it doesn’t make a lot of sense. I guess it doesn’t have to. Like love, it just is. Read more

  • It Does Happen Twice

    I’ve probably seen Sleepless in Seattle ten times and never once realized it was a movie about grieving. Read more

  • Steps

    I was afraid that if I married Marty, I’d somehow be disloyal to Michael. Read more

  • “Channeling” Those We’ve Loved and Lost

    Why is Michael speaking to and through me at this point in my life? Read more

  • Last Christmas

    We didn’t know it was our last Christmas. Read more

  • The Right to Grieve

    If we’re all allowed to mourn completely, we can walk toward new beginnings with our hands planted firmly in the hand of those we’ve lost. Read more

  • A Living Year

    Made up of days for taking chances and building a new life together, it was a living year. Read more

  • The Only Thing That Matters

    It instantly and irrevocably distilled the meaning and value of our twenty-two years together into seven tiny words. Love was the only thing that mattered. Read more

  • We Mend, But We Don’t Forget

    I’ve mended, weaving his memory into my new existence. Read more

  • Having Him Here

    I realized that although he and I wouldn’t share the same experiences that Mike and I had, we would enjoy the discovery of new and different ones together. Read more

  • The Beautiful Different

    Aren’t we all misfits when we get down to the nitty-gritty of being human?   Read more

  • A Journey to Hope

    I discussed my day or asked his advice. Sometimes this felt foolish. Sometimes, it was comforting. Either way, I felt closer to him while I was doing it. Read more

  • The Sound of Silence

    I couldn’t stand the absence of noise even though I was living with other people, and this was true for several years after Mike’s death. Read more

  • Appreciating Those We Love Now

    I wonder why we wait to say such things about those we’ve loved and lost? Why do we hold back, biding precious time before truly celebrating who they are? Read more

  • Living Around Grief

    Glimpses of those we love don’t suddenly disappear with a new existence but live within it. Read more

  • The Enchanted Cottage, Difference and the Power of Love

    Love allows us to see the truth. Read more

  • Belonging(s)

    We’d taken the first permanent step toward a new life together. Read more

  • Life’s Infinite Fragilities

    I’d come within inches of losing someone else I loved. Read more

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